When "Happy Valentine's Day" Is Not About My Boyfriend





 Last week I received an Instagram message in the middle of a busy morning from a username I didn't recognize. I clicked on it, expecting it to be one of those spam accounts and found instead a sincere message from a stranger:
"Girl, I don't even know you. I just stumbled across a blog post you wrote about being single two years ago and I am so so grateful...thank you for being vulnerable."
Following this, the reader linked to the blog post in question. To be honest, I have not given much thought to my blog in the last year. Curious as to which post she had read, I followed the link to an article from Valentine's Day 2018 that I'd called "When 'I'm Tired of Being Single' Means So Incredibly Much More."

It seemed like a commonplace enough Valentine's post for the career-single girl I was until June, 2019 when I met Andrew. (Some of you have asked for that story and although it feels like a strange thing to trumpet across the internet, if you truly want to hear how a sports-obsessed guy from Buffalo ended up winning my heart, I'll spill the tea). As I scanned that blog post, I smiled at 2018 Rachel who was so close to a turning point of finding joy in her singleness. That version of me had no idea how much light lay in the road ahead; nor how much grief.